Gay Men and The Serenity of Acceptance, Courage, Wisdom

One of the most rewarding parts of my long (28 years!) career as a gay men’s specialist therapist and coach is the variety of guys that I’ve had the pleasure to work with.  There is so much variety to their initial issues or challenges that they are presenting to treatment with, and yet often I … Read more

Of Potions, Pills and Powders: Gay Therapist Describes Approaches to Drug Use in Gay Men’s Relationships

Drug use in gay relationships is a common, if controversial, topic to discuss.  Regular readers know that I’m not one to shy away from controversial topics about gay men’s lives, and today I’d like to discuss this.  In the privacy of therapy, even when I work remotely with guys on webcam sessions, we use the … Read more

Gay Men in Recovery: 4 Tips to Cope with HALT (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired)

Sounds dire, doesn’t it? Here you are, doing the good, hard work it takes to get clean and sober.  But on top of your daily struggle, you’re warned (usually in AA) that you may have four other demons to confront: Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. These are the unsettlers that may tempt you to head back … Read more

Gay Men and Alcohol: The Relationship with the Bottle

Today I wanted to write about gay men and alcohol, and what I call their “relationship” with the bottle.  Over my many years as a psychotherapist, one of the most frequent issues my clients bring to me is a concern about their drinking, or perhaps their drug use.  There is a wide range; some people … Read more