Gay Men and The Serenity of Acceptance, Courage, Wisdom

One of the most rewarding parts of my long (28 years!) career as a gay men’s specialist therapist and coach is the variety of guys that I’ve had the pleasure to work with.  There is so much variety to their initial issues or challenges that they are presenting to treatment with, and yet often I … Read more

Gay Tips for “Relationship 2.0”: Should I Go Back with My Ex?

Gay Therapist Tips for "Relationship 2.0": Should I Go Back with My Ex?

As a gay men’s specialist therapist for individuals and for gay men’s relationships for over 27 years, I notice how certain themes come up regularly.  Lately, several of my clients have presented the dilemma in their therapy of whether they should go back with an ex, and form a “Version 2.0” new/resumed relationship with them. … Read more

Gay Therapist Gives Tips for Gay Men Aging Gracefully: Part I: Emotionally and Physically

Tips for Dating and Sex in Single Older Gay Men

Part I:  Emotionally and Physically In this three-part series of blog articles, I’d like to share some of the ways that I’ve seen my gay male clients benefit from therapy in a way that most people probably don’t think about:  how therapy helps with a healthy aging.  As a specialist in LGBT affirmative therapy, and … Read more

Gay Men in Recovery: 4 Tips to Cope with HALT (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired)

Sounds dire, doesn’t it? Here you are, doing the good, hard work it takes to get clean and sober.  But on top of your daily struggle, you’re warned (usually in AA) that you may have four other demons to confront: Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. These are the unsettlers that may tempt you to head back … Read more

Gay Men’s Relationships: Ten Ways They Differ from Straight Relationships

As I think back on the past 24 years (by 2014) of providing couples counseling for gay male relationships, I sometimes get asked what the differences are that I see (in general) in gay male relationships that are (in general) different from straight relationships.  In no particular order, below, are some of my thoughts.  I … Read more

Why No One Starts Therapy in December — And Why You Should

A Secular Appreciation of Christmas

Happy December!  How are those New Year’s Resolutions working out for you? You know, the ones that you had in January, almost a year ago?  Do you remember what they were?  Did you make any?  Did you have goals for this year?  Did you reach those goals? The other day, I reviewed my Goals List … Read more

Powerful Thoughts for Fabulous Living at Every Age for Gay Men

Louise Hay and the Power of Thoughts Lately, I’ve been revisiting the writings of Louise Hay, the New Age spiritual author and speaker whom I’ve followed for a long time now.  She’s 84, and lives a very vibrant life in San Diego.  Her whole message is about loving the self, and using the power of … Read more