Two Bottoms, Two Tops:  A Gay Men’s Relationship Dilemma – Now What?

In my private practice specializing in gay men’s therapy and coaching (for over 28 years), and more recently specializing more in sex therapy issues, one of the challenges that guys bring to me fairly frequently in asking for help is the dilemma of being in a very good relationship that neither partner wants to leave, … Read more

Gay Counselor on Why Nerds Make the Best Boyfriends 

As a gay counselor (therapist, coach, sex therapist – I do all of those) for 28 years, I always enjoy when discussions with my clients inspire me to write on a blog topic because “life’s truths” just seem to jump out at us in discussion.  One of these was recently when I found myself saying, “I’m convinced … Read more

Gay Men Coping with Single Life: Tips and Tricks

Gay Men Coping with Single Life: Tips and Tricks At the time of this writing in April, 2020, we are in the midst of the global COVID-19/coronavirus crisis and there are “lockdown”/quarantine conditions all over the world.  I am continuing to provide both therapy or coaching services to my clients who live locally to the … Read more

Gay Men’s Relationships: Reconciling the Living Room with the Bedroom

How to enjoy gay pride parades.

Gay Men’s Relationships: Reconciling the Living Room with the Bedroom In my long career (27 years) working with gay male couples as a therapist and relationship coach, I tend to see the same problems gay male couples have in therapy over and over – but, fortunately, there are often similar solutions.  One of the professional … Read more

Gay Couples Therapy Challenges:  “My Partner Isn’t Contributing Equally!”

Gay Couples Therapy Challenges:  “My Partner Isn’t Contributing Equally!”

One of the most common themes I hear in my psychotherapy practice in Los Angeles (specializing in therapy and coaching for gay men, and gay male couples, for over 27 years) is in relationships (Gay Relationship Inequality) where one partner has a complaint that he feels his partner is not “making an equal contribution to … Read more

Topics in Sex Therapy for Gay Men:  Overcoming Fear of Bottoming

[WARNING: CONTAINS SEX THERAPY CONTENT NOT SUITABLE FOR UNDER 18] I’ve been a specialist in therapy and coaching for gay men for over 27 years, as individuals and couples.  I work with guys on lots of issues and disorders, such as depression, bipolar disorder, OCD, ADD, substance abuse recovery, dating skills, career planning, and couples … Read more

Gay Tips for “Relationship 2.0”: Should I Go Back with My Ex?

Gay Therapist Tips for "Relationship 2.0": Should I Go Back with My Ex?

As a gay men’s specialist therapist for individuals and for gay men’s relationships for over 27 years, I notice how certain themes come up regularly.  Lately, several of my clients have presented the dilemma in their therapy of whether they should go back with an ex, and form a “Version 2.0” new/resumed relationship with them. … Read more

A Gay Therapist Gives Tips on How Gay Men Can Cope with the Breakup of a Friendship

Lonely man sitting on a train lines without hope. Outdoor, outside

Gay Men and Friendships:  How to Cope with the Breakup of a Friendship As a gay male therapist with over 26 years of experience, I’ve seen many clients have to deal with how interpersonal relationships in their lives change over time.  Much of the time, I help guys with dating and romantic/domestic relationship issues, but lately some … Read more

Gay Therapist on Gay Men and Erectile Dysfunction: Cognitive Causes and Cures

Gay Men and Erectile Dysfunction: Cognitive Causes and Cures

Hard Times:  Gay Men and Erectile Dysfunction – Causes and Cures Background:  Erectile Dysfunction in Gay Men I’ve been a therapist who specializes in therapy for gay men for over 26 years, and one of the most frequent topics discussed in my office is about sexual anxieties, in particular erectile dysfunction (ED), sometimes in the … Read more

Tips for Problem-Solving in Gay Men’s Open Relationships from a Gay Therapist

Relationship Counseling Therapist for Gay Men

Problem-Solving in Gay Men’s Open Relationships:  Special Topics In a number of previous blog articles on gay men’s relationships in general, and gay open relationships in particular, such as How to Have An Open Relationship Without Hurt Feelings, Part One and Part Two, I’ve discussed how research shows that about half of gay male couples … Read more