Gay Men’s Relationships: How to Deal with Your Ex

two men with their arms crossed and cocked to the side slightly

Maybe this title is misleading, because maybe, as a gay man who has left a relationship, you don’t want to “deal” with your ex at all.  And yet lately, in my therapy and coaching practice as a gay men’s specialist and AASECT-Certified sex therapist, I’ve been helping a lot of guys on the topic of coping … Read more

Gay Sex Therapist on Sexual Mental Health:  The Triumvirate of Self, Partner, and Others

Gay Sex Therapist on Sexual Mental Health:  The Triumvirate of Self, Partner, and Others Sex Therapy: A Background As a long-term (29 years in 2021) gay men’s specialist therapist and gay sex therapist, relatively recently becoming an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (the national credential), I have worked with hundreds or thousands of gay men to … Read more

Gay Men’s Goals: How Do You Define Success in the New Year?

man holding 2021 balloon

With a few weeks into the new year, I’ve been talking with a lot of my clients about their goals for 2021.  I have often done this with clients at the start of a new year throughout my long career (29 years) as a gay men’s specialist therapist and coach, but this year is so very … Read more

Gay Relationships and the ‘Sexual Thaw’: Restoring Sex After a Long Stalemate

In a recent informal Facebook poll I conducted on suggested blog topics, this topic won the most votes, so here goes:  (Readers are encouraged to notify me at Ken@GayTherapyLA.com if you have suggestions for future blog/podcast topics.) In my long (28 years in 2020) career providing therapy and coaching for gay men, couples therapy for … Read more

Gay Men and Sex During COVID-19

As I continue to see clients online during this “COVID Era” as I call it, I notice patterns of how “my guys” are coping.  Of course, dealing with the whole COVID-19 pandemic and its many stressors about the economy, work, housing during quarantine, relationships, and dating manifest in different ways, depending on where you live (where … Read more

Two Bottoms, Two Tops:  A Gay Men’s Relationship Dilemma – Now What?

2 gay men in bed with one sitting on the edge looking frustrated

In my private practice specializing in gay men’s therapy and coaching (for over 28 years), and more recently specializing more in sex therapy issues, one of the challenges that guys bring to me fairly frequently in asking for help is the dilemma of being in a very good relationship that neither partner wants to leave, … Read more

Gay Men and The Serenity of Acceptance, Courage, Wisdom

One of the most rewarding parts of my long (28 years!) career as a gay men’s specialist therapist and coach is the variety of guys that I’ve had the pleasure to work with.  There is so much variety to their initial issues or challenges that they are presenting to treatment with, and yet often I … Read more

Gay Men’s Relationships: Reconciling the Living Room with the Bedroom

Gay Men’s Relationships: Reconciling the Living Room with the Bedroom In my long career (27 years) working with gay male couples as a therapist and relationship coach, I tend to see the same problems gay male couples have in therapy over and over – but, fortunately, there are often similar solutions.  One of the professional … Read more

Topics in Sex Therapy for Gay Men:  Overcoming Fear of Topping

[WARNING: CONTAINS SEX THERAPY CONTENT NOT SUITABLE FOR UNDER 18] In part one of this two-part article on gay men’s fears in sex, I discussed the fear of bottoming.  In this part, we look at gay men who have a fear of topping instead. I’ve been a specialist in therapy and coaching for gay men … Read more

Topics in Sex Therapy for Gay Men:  Overcoming Fear of Bottoming

[WARNING: CONTAINS SEX THERAPY CONTENT NOT SUITABLE FOR UNDER 18] I’ve been a specialist in therapy and coaching for gay men for over 27 years, as individuals and couples.  I work with guys on lots of issues and disorders, such as depression, bipolar disorder, OCD, ADD, substance abuse recovery, dating skills, career planning, and couples … Read more