Improving Gay Men’s Relationships: Meeting Three Needs: Emotional, Sexual, Interpersonal

In a previous article (here), I cautioned single gay men about their dating skills and avoiding the all-too-often seen pitfalls of putting the emphasis in dating on the wrong things, such as Cash, Connections, and C—k.  As someone in a 19-year gay relationship with my partner/husband, I always say to clients that the things that … Read more

Three Ways to Improve Your Sex Life for Gay Men

  In my daily work with clients as a gay men’s specialist therapist for 29 years in 2021, AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, as well as an LGBT-affirmative, gay men’s specialist coach, author, speaker, and consultant, one of the most frequent questions I get is how to help gay male couples improve their sex lives. It’s … Read more

Gay Men as Workplace Supervisors: Survival Tips for When You’re the New Boss

Gay Men as Workplace Supervisors: Survival Tips for When You're the New Boss

For over 24 years, my specialty as a therapist and life/business coach has been working with gay men.  For many topics, treating or coaching a gay man is very similar to how a woman (straight or gay) or a straight man would be.  However, “cultural competency” in working with gay men demands that the provider … Read more

The Six Principles of Sexual Health as Applied to Gay Men: A Guide

I’ve been enjoying my recent completion of the Certified Sex Therapist credential from AASECT, the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists.  I achieved this not only from my long experience as a gay men’s specialist therapist (29 years in 2021), but also through completing an 18-month continuing education program for therapists provided by … Read more

How to Avoid a Gay Relationship Breakup – The Four Risks

How to Avoid a Gay Relationship Breakup – The Four Risks As a psychotherapist specializing in gay men and gay male couples therapy for over 28 years, I’ve worked with so many different kinds of ages, nationalities, ethnicities, and backgrounds. You could say I’ve made a study of it, and I teach a course on couples … Read more

Gay Men and Money Management: How to Empower Yourself

Gay Men and Money Management:  How to Empower Yourself When I told a friend I was writing about “gay men and money management,” he said, “Ha!  That’s not for me; I don’t have any money to manage.” And maybe you feel this way, too.  But here’s the thing: you don’t need to have a lot … Read more

Gay Sex Therapist on Sexual Mental Health:  The Triumvirate of Self, Partner, and Others

Gay Sex Therapist on Sexual Mental Health:  The Triumvirate of Self, Partner, and Others Sex Therapy: A Background As a long-term (29 years in 2021) gay men’s specialist therapist and gay sex therapist, relatively recently becoming an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (the national credential), I have worked with hundreds or thousands of gay men to … Read more

Gay Men’s Goals: How Do You Define Success in the New Year?

man holding 2021 balloon

With a few weeks into the new year, I’ve been talking with a lot of my clients about their goals for 2021.  I have often done this with clients at the start of a new year throughout my long career (29 years) as a gay men’s specialist therapist and coach, but this year is so very … Read more

Gay Men’s Relationship Vocabulary: Partner? Husband? Hookup?

Gay Men’s Relationship Vocabulary: Partner? Husband? Hookup?

In my long (29 years in 2021) career as a specialist in therapy for gay men and gay men’s coaching, I’ve helped guys in many different kinds of relationship styles.  Along with these styles comes a commensurate “vocabulary” that gay men use to describe and understand their relationships and the people involved in them.  It’s … Read more

On 30 Years of Living with HIV: A Reflection: Semper Fi

On 30 Years of Living with HIV:  A Reflection Ten years ago, on November 3, 2010, I published a blog article on 20 years of living with HIV.  It was in response to a hate letter that I received shortly before that, and I expressed my feelings then about what living with HIV was like … Read more