Gay Men and New Year, New Sex: Mind, Heart, Body

interracial gay couple standing deposit photo January 2023

Gay Men and New Year, New Sex: Mind, Heart, Body   Happy New Year!  As I start my 31st year as a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist, life/career/relationship coach, and AASECT-Certified sex therapist, I challenge myself to think of expansive, new ideas.  The new year, for all of us, is like a blank piece of paper … Read more

Gay Men Who Have Given Up on Finding a Relationship

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Gay Men Who Have Given Up on Finding a Relationship In my thirty years (2022) of being a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist and life/career/relationship coach, perhaps the most common topic new clients present to me in asking for help is about relationships (and, relatedly, sex).  There are other topics, too, about raising your quality of … Read more

Gay Men and Coping with Specific Traumas – PART TWO

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Gay Men and Coping with Specific Traumas – PART TWO In Part One of this discussion, I talked about coping with specific traumas that include Medical, Legal, Academic, and Criminal traumas, and how to cope with them. Here in Part Two, I will discuss Workplace, Family of Origin, Political, and Social/Peer traumas, and how to … Read more

Gay Men and Coping with Specific Traumas – PART ONE

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Gay Men and Coping with Specific Traumas – PART ONE Throughout my career as a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist (for 30 years in 2022), I’ve helped a lot of gay men who have been the victims – and survivors – of various kinds of trauma.  I use the terms both “victim” and “survivor” to validate … Read more

PART TWO – Gay Men’s Dating Situations That Are “No-Go” – And Their Alternatives

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Gay Men’s Dating Situations That Are “No-Go” – And Their Alternatives – PART TWO In Part One of this article, I discussed topics that are a “no-go” in gay men’s dating situations, such as racism/bigotry, money neurosis, unresolved trauma, and several more. As a long-term (30 years in 2022) gay men’s specialist psychotherapist for individuals, … Read more

Gay Men’s Dating Situations That Are “No-Go” – And Their Alternatives – PART ONE

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Gay Men’s Dating Situations That Are “No-Go” – And Their Alternatives – PART ONE As a long-term (30 years in 2022) gay men’s specialist psychotherapist for individuals, couples, polycules, and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST), I work with guys daily on relationships – finding them, improving them, and, in some cases, coping with ending them. … Read more

Gay Men and the Mental Health Aspects of Monkey Pox

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Gay Men and the Mental Health Aspects of Monkey Pox Currently, as of this writing in early August, 2022, no topic is more timely among gay men, apparently worldwide, than Monkey Pox. And while many (most?) people these days refer to anything about sexual and gender minorities as “LGBT,” I find some very real, practical … Read more

Gay Men, Pride Season, and Summer Lovin’

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Gay Men, Pride Season, and Summer Lovin’              Summer lovin’             Had me a blast,             Summer lovin’             Happened so fast,             I met a [girl] crazy for me             Met a boy, cute as can be! Source: Musixmatch Songwriters: Jim Jacobs / Warren Casey Summer Nights lyrics © Edwin H. Morris & Co. … Read more

Gay Men and Mismatched Libidos: Navigating Difference

gay male couple arguing on a bed one white one latino blue shirts

Gay Men and Mismatched Libidos: Navigating Difference Several times recently in my work in sex therapy for gay men, clients have asked me about what to do if they want more, or less, sex than their partner.  It’s sometimes referred to as “desire discrepancy” or “mismatched libidos,” and it can happen in gay or straight … Read more

Mental Health Aspects of Sexual Health for Gay Men

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Mental Health Aspects of Sexual Health for Gay Men As a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist and coach for now 30 years (in 2022), and as a Certified Psychiatric Social Worker, and now AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, perhaps it follows that I might be interested in sharing some thoughts about the intersection of psychiatric disorders, physical … Read more