On 30 Years of Living with HIV: A Reflection: Semper Fi

On 30 Years of Living with HIV:  A Reflection Ten years ago, on November 3, 2010, I published a blog article on 20 years of living with HIV.  It was in response to a hate letter that I received shortly before that, and I expressed my feelings then about what living with HIV was like … Read more

Gay Men and Sex During COVID-19

As I continue to see clients online during this “COVID Era” as I call it, I notice patterns of how “my guys” are coping.  Of course, dealing with the whole COVID-19 pandemic and its many stressors about the economy, work, housing during quarantine, relationships, and dating manifest in different ways, depending on where you live (where … Read more

Gay Men’s Relationship Advice: How to Succeed in an Age-Difference Relationship

As a very long-term (28 years) specialist in therapy for gay men, I’m asked often for gay men’s relationship advice, especially how to overcome some of the most common and classic challenges in gay relationships.  Among these are questions about gay relationship situational difficulties that have to do with where and how we live, such as … Read more

Gay Male Relationship Advice: How to Succeed in a Long-Distance Relationship

Man video chatting with his partner over the computer.

As an LGBT-affirmative therapy specialist, and, more specifically, a specialist in gay men’s therapy, gay couples therapy, gay sex therapy, and gay coaching (life/career/relationship), I’m often asked the same questions for guidance over my long (28 years) career.  One of these is, “How do gay men successfully navigate the challenges of a long-distance relationship?”  And my answer … Read more

Two Bottoms, Two Tops:  A Gay Men’s Relationship Dilemma – Now What?

In my private practice specializing in gay men’s therapy and coaching (for over 28 years), and more recently specializing more in sex therapy issues, one of the challenges that guys bring to me fairly frequently in asking for help is the dilemma of being in a very good relationship that neither partner wants to leave, … Read more

Gay Men’s Strengths: Making the Most of Your Culture

  I have been a psychotherapist specializing in gay men for over 28 years, and I do this as a Licensed Clinical Social Worker in California, as well as providing life/career/relationship coaching to guys outside of California and in other states and other countries around the world, and I’m also a trained sex therapist.  But … Read more

Gay Men and Discipline: The Secret Weapon for Achieving Your Goals

Man Rolling Up Sleeves

Gay Men and Discipline: The Secret Weapon for Achieving Your Goals I’d like to start this article about “discipline” by admitting that I’ve been procrastinating writing it.  Which shows exactly why it needs to be written.  How many of you have done the same? You think about doing something.  You know it would be valuable … Read more

Gay Men Coping with Stress:  Start at the Source

Gay Men Coping with Stress:  Start at the Source At the time of this writing (June, 2020), we, as a country, in the United States, and all of us in the world are experiencing unprecedented times, and not in a good way.  Since into the first quarter of 2020 (some would say even before), our … Read more

Coping with COVID-19 for Gay Men: What Type Are You?

How Gay Men Can Face Any Problem: Developing Resilience – Part 1: Traits

Coping with COVID-19 for Gay Men: What Type Are You? Now that many weeks (months) are going by since the initial “lockdown” or “quarantine” conditions due to novel coronavirus/COVID-19, I’m seeing a number of patterns emerge among my clients of my therapy and coaching practice, as a long-term (28 years!) gay men’s specialist.  Whether it’s … Read more

Gay Men Coping with Single Life: Tips and Tricks

Gay Men Coping with Single Life: Tips and Tricks At the time of this writing in April, 2020, we are in the midst of the global COVID-19/coronavirus crisis and there are “lockdown”/quarantine conditions all over the world.  I am continuing to provide both therapy or coaching services to my clients who live locally to the … Read more