Follow Me!
Follow Me on Facebook  

Art & Science of Therapy

Shrink at the Movies: “The King’s Speech” (2010)

“The King’s Speech” (2010)

Criticize, if you must, the cultural and technological juggernaut that is all things Facebook.  But I, for one, am very grateful that this phenomenon exists.  For many reasons, but one of my favorites is the opportunity to connect with people from My Past that I had lost touch with.  One such person is my high school friend and colleague, actor Robert Stanton, who was (like me) very active in our high school’s prestigious Drama Department (though he was/is FAR more talented than I), who went on to become a successful actor in New York and Hollywood with an impressive body of work, and counting.  So when Robert posted his welcoming message on my “Shrink at the Movies” Facebook wall that, “The King’s Speech is the best movie about psychotherapy ever made; discuss”, I had no choice but to, well, discuss.  So, Robert dear, this is for you.

Technically, Geoffrey Rush’s character in “The King’s Speech” (directed by Tom Hooper, who won the Directing Oscar, and starring Colin Firth, who won the Best Actor Oscar) is not a psychotherapist, but is a speech pathologist, aka speech therapist, who treats the King of England for a stuttering problem.  I do not treat stutter in my work as a psychotherapist, but I understand the inclination to meld the two professions, especially given their emphasis on the interpersonal communication and relationship between therapist and client.  According to sources close to the real Lionel Logue (Geoffrey Rush), Logue apparently combined elements of speech therapy with an exploration of any psychological underpinnings for the condition (in this case, the hypercritical former king who abuses the young prince who eventually becomes the King, Logue’s patient).

Rush’s character early on establishes what we therapists call a “therapeutic alliance” with the King.  He also dispenses with any of that “your  Highness” protocol in the office and calls him by his first name, or actually his nickname, “Bertie”, so that at least a level, collaborative playing field can be established, or even a teacher-student hierarchical one.  This is, I believe, an important point.  When I work with someone, as I like to say, “in the public eye,” it would do us no good for me to be “star struck” and lose objectivity.  I might admire their work – I might even be in awe of their talent, skill, and the importance of their body of work, and the effect they have had on an industry and many people – but in the office, in doing the work, we are on a first-name basis and all is fair in confronting them on the areas where we determine that they undermine themselves and self-sabotage their own important life goals (just like any other client).  It is only through establishing this rapport and alliance with Bertie that Logue is able to probe where the heart of the problem lies in his troubled past as a child.

The later conflicts between Logue and Bertie, especially when Bertie gets frustrated and frequently uses the word “fuck” as a coping mantra to bind his own frustration and anxiety, are reminiscent of some “middle treatment” issues – not the beginning of the work, which is establishing the relationship, and not the end of the work, which is reviewing and consolidating gains in what therapists call the “termination” process (which sounds kind of awful, I realize), but middle treatment, where the therapeutic relationship is really covering ground at full cruising altitude.  It’s like the middle of a movie, play, marathon, workout, painting, sculpture, or even rock concert, and some would argue that this is where the good stuff really happens.

“The King’s Speech” also does a good job, I think, of depicting what we clinical social workers call the “micro” (person to person) versus the “macro” (the broader community or society) aspects of our work (I say clinical social workers because we tend to use the micro/macro terms, while my colleagues who are other types of licensed mental health professionals tend not to use this concept).  The “micro” relationship is between Logue and Bertie along together in a clinical treatment process; the “macro”, or world-at-large, implication is that Logue, the teacher, is helping Bertie, the KING OF ENGLAND, to prepare an entire nation for a major World War.  While the importance of achieving psychotherapy’s goals are usually apparent to the client, in the case of Logue and Bertie, the implications for WHY he needed to overcome his stammer, at least in part, were critical for a very high-profile job that requires the broadcast of formal speeches to support the morale of an entire country.  While everyone I work with significantly influences the lives of others (the lesson of “It’s a Wonderful Life” (1946), which I will address in another essay), when I work with someone on whom hundreds of employees depend and millions of dollars are at stake, the work has especially sobering macro implications.  It’s not that these clients are “more important,” it’s that the stakes are higher of the magnitude of the implications for their success or failure at functioning well on many different personal and professional levels.  One wonders if the client in Logue’s office just before, or just after, sessions with Bertie got the same attention and treatment as the Royal Sovereign might.  I think, with Logue and with most therapists, they would.  Many therapists work on a sliding scale of their fee (perhaps giving a discounted fee occasionally to people of lower income);  they do not, however, work any sort of “sliding scale” on their efforts with the client.  This is part of the ethics of the profession, which are numerous and gravely important.

As I teach my students in my clinical practice class at the USC School of Social Work, there are many articles in the academic literature that purport the idea that it is not so much the psychotherapeutic theory or technique used with a patient (I use “client” and “patient” interchangeably) that affects the therapy outcome, it is primarily the quality of the relationship between therapist and client that affects positive outcomes.  While some studies indicate a slight edge of success for Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (my personal favorite), and for what is called “evidence-based practice” of some techniques over others, I have found in my 20 years of doing therapy that it is, indeed, this relationship that is ultimately where the magic of therapy happens.

So it stands to reason, then, that my friend Robert Stanton, whom I worship from afar (he’s in New York), is perhaps correct when he says that “The King’s Speech” is the best movie about psychotherapy ever made.  Now, we have to consider some others, even such hilarious send-ups such as “Analyze This” (1999), which I will also try to address in a future essay, and a few others along the way, but I think Stanton’s overall hypothesis could be correct in that the Oscar-win-inspiring “King’s Speech” depicts the precious joy that is the therapeutic relationship.  Long live the King.

Memory: Blessing or Curse?

I thought about this recently, after a particularly busy day of sessions of clients in my practice.  Is having memory a blessing, or a curse?

I was moved by stories of clients who are abuse survivors, with their ability to recall the traumatically abusive incidents that happened to them in detail from various self-indulgent and sick individuals who couldn’t contain their emotionally and physically violent impulses and perpetrated terrible interpersonal crimes.  Such minute details – about exactly what was said, what was seen, heard, felt – physically and emotionally – and of course the aftermath of denial, disbelief, dismissiveness, obfuscation, deflecting – making it all even worse.  Memory, in those instances, was a cruel tyrant, not letting them forget things that are a re-injury every time they are recalled.

But many years ago, early in my career, I worked at a psychiatric hospital that had a senior citizen patient program.  There is nothing quite like being with a group of people with life-long mental illness, including personality disorders, combined with the effects of aging.  An old, entitled Narcissist is something to see.  But I developed compassion for these patients, who had had to endure the loss of so much – first, their mental health, but over time, their loved ones, their careers, and their sense of familiarity with the ever-changing world.  One of their few solaces was memory – which was consistently intact among the group of them – all too ready to reminisce about happier, healthier times, and putting their own personal spin on historical times and events that they were there to see, and I only experienced through history books.  Memory, in those instances, was a benevolent friend, who gave them a smooth-paved road to emotional comfort and joy, at least for as long as a moment of reverie might last.

In mental health, there is so much duality.  Memory can be a tyrant, or a friend.  Our same energetic impulses that can get us in trouble if we don’t manage anger, are the same angry impulses that can set limits and protect us from being abused or exploited by others when we defend ourselves – interpersonally, or politically.  Our healthy passions that give us a good appetite and a strong libido, taken to their extremes, can lead to obesity and sexual addiction.  Our impulses to act that keep us from languishing and not accomplishing anything, can lead to foolhardiness and impulsivity on their opposite.  What are we left with?

We’re left with the responsibility that we must harness our own self-empowerment (my favorite word in mental health) to regulate our memory, our emotions, our impulses, our drives.  We have to summon up the things we need to get by in life – our internal resources of courage, resolve, focus, determination, action, patience, and discretion — but we must know how to dial back so that we don’t pay the price of excess.  Too much courage, we bully others.  Too little, we are victims.  Too much action, we exhaust ourselves.  Too little, and we languish in the status quo.  Too much patience, we lose opportunity.  Too little, we lose opportunity as well.  Too little discretion, we waste our resources.  Too much, and we never get anything done or have any fun outside of our comfort zone.

Think about what balance means for you.  What would you like to try to forget, to reduce Memory being a tyrant?  What would you like to be sure to recall – often – that helps you to stay inspired, motivated, and positive in your outlook?

What impulses and actions of yours are dormant, and need a little boosting and waking up so that you can harness and apply their energies more effectively?

What impulses and actions of yours are wily and untamed, and need a little “grooming” so that you don’t feel like they’re getting away from you, and making you pay a price you don’t want to pay anymore?

Asking ourselves how we can use our internal and emotional resources better, more efficiently, and more effectively, can help us to reach the goals we set for ourselves, increase our sense of peace-of-mind, and our self-empowerment – to have the life we want.
(My new book, “Self-Empowerment: Have the Life You Want!” is available in e-book format for Amazon Kindle, Barnes & Noble Nook, Apple iBook via Smashwords, and soon in hardcover at LuLu.com.  My podcast, “Have the Life You Want with Ken Howard, LCSW”, is enjoyed in over 30 countries of the world and is available on iTunes, Zune, and Podcast Alley).

Coming Into Therapy Scary

Dear Ken,I’m impressed with your website, but I’m just afraid to come in. I’m afraid what it will cost, and that I might not like what I see when I really look at myself. How do I feel safe in coming in to see you?

Reluctant Patient

Dear Reluctant, Read the rest of this entry »

Getting Crystal Clear: A New Deal (Crystal Meth Recovery)

The Mental Health Aspects of Crystal Meth Recovery

Perhaps no issue is hotter in the gay community these days than that of Crystal Meth. It seems everyone is either doing it themselves, or knows someone who uses regularly, and almost everyone knows someone who “has a problem” with it – from problem use that affects their job or relationships, to full-on addiction that has the same effect as a major medical illness. In my work as a psychotherapist, nearly one-third of my practice consists of gay men who are trying to get off, and stay off, using crystal. While various drug treatment centers exist (including the promising and innovative Prometa Center), and while AA and CMA are vital resources in the community, the mental health aspects of crystal use deserve more attention and discussion in the community. Read the rest of this entry »

Reflections on Labor Day: Have the Work Life You Want with Executive or Vocational Coaching

Labor Day was designed to be a holiday where we take time to celebrate the accomplishments and the sacrifice of the American worker. Recently in my psychotherapy practice, I have begun to offer more and more sessions on executive or vocational coaching, because a rewarding work life as part of a satisfying career is a key component of a person’s mental health. Read the rest of this entry »

Applying “The Secret” To Gay Men’s Lives

The recent (and perhaps transient) popularity of “The Secret,” the almost “underground” self-help DVD that has become the latest rage of “Oprah” and “Ellen” in recent weeks, has been the topic of water-cooler conversations all over the country and certainly in therapist’s offices like mine. Read the rest of this entry »

The Gifts from Oz: Lessons for HIV

The recent annual telecast by cable network TBS of the classic 1939 MGM film, “The Wizard of Oz” marks an annual ritual for me that dates back to when I was four. Watching this wonderful work of Hollywood magic each year gives me a chance to revisit its dazzling color, charm, and beauty like visiting an old friend. It also gives me a chance to contemplate its universal, timeless themes that coincide with the characters’ deepest desires: Read the rest of this entry »

Express Yourself, Part II

For the previous article to this, click here for Express Yourself, Part I

Last month, I related a story of a recent study from Dr. Kevin J. Petrie at the University of Auckland (New Zealand) of how 37 people living with HIV were studied in two groups: one group who expressively wrote about their feelings for 30 minutes a day on 4 consecutive days, and a comparison group who wrote objectively about how they occupied their time. Read the rest of this entry »

Express Yourself

A friend of mine recently was telling me about an article he read about a study where people living with HIV who were shy – socially, emotionally reserved – had significantly worse overall health than people who were not shy. This story seemed to underscore the old adage about how “it’s not good for you to bottle up your feelings.” Read the rest of this entry »

When Your Therapist Is Part of the Problem

In my first column for A&U in August 2002, I wrote about how everybody is a therapist these days – from massage therapy to aromatherapy. I wrote then about how the term “therapist,” as I use it, refers specifically to professional providers of counseling and psychotherapy, who are appropriately trained and licensed by the states in which they practice. By having objective credentialing standards and standards of care, consumers of mental health services are protected from the modern-day equivalent of snake-oil, cure-all hucksters. Read the rest of this entry »