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COVID’s End as Trauma Recovery in Gay Men

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COVID-19 As a Traumatic Experience At the time of this writing in early June, 2021, my local community of Los Angeles/West Hollywood (California) is gearing up for the broader grand re-opening of California by order of Governor Gavin Newsom on June 15th (according to a Los Angeles Times article of May 21, 2021, here). The new guidelines basically … Read more

Gay Men’s Goals: How Do You Define Success in the New Year?

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With a few weeks into the new year, I’ve been talking with a lot of my clients about their goals for 2021.  I have often done this with clients at the start of a new year throughout my long career (29 years) as a gay men’s specialist therapist and coach, but this year is so very … Read more

Gay Men, COVID-19, and Avoiding the Pitfalls: Substances, Lethargy, and Despair

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Gay Men, COVID-19, and Avoiding the Pitfalls: Substances, Lethargy, and Despair   Identifying and Coping with the “Pitfalls” in COVID-19 As I continue online therapy and coaching sessions in my practice at GayTherapyLA as a gay men’s specialist for individuals and couples (over 28 years in 2020), I’m seeing the effects of COVID-19 on guys … Read more

Coping with COVID-19 for Gay Men: What Type Are You?

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Coping with COVID-19 for Gay Men: What Type Are You? Now that many weeks (months) are going by since the initial “lockdown” or “quarantine” conditions due to novel coronavirus/COVID-19, I’m seeing a number of patterns emerge among my clients of my therapy and coaching practice, as a long-term (28 years!) gay men’s specialist.  Whether it’s … Read more

Gay Therapist Discusses “Toxic Busy”: How Much Is Too Much for Gay Men?

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Recently in my psychotherapy and coaching practice that has focused on gay men and gay male couples for over 26 years, a client started a session by talking about his previous week.  “How was this week?” I asked. “Oh, boy.  Lots going on.  Been busy.  Very busy.  Toxic busy!” That phrase struck me. “Toxic busy”.  … Read more

Ten Tips to Reduce Your Election Stress This Weekend: A Guide for Gay Men

There’s a saying that says, “don’t be part of the problem, be part of the solution.” So many of my friends on Facebook, my clients, and just people I talk to, have reported that they have had such a hard week and hard time for a number of weeks now, because they are stressed about … Read more

Gay Therapist Gives Tips on Gay Men Aging Gracefully: Part III: Domestically and Financially

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In this third and last of my three-part series on how therapy can help gay men age gracefully, I’d like to share how therapy can help you be at your best domestically and financially.  (In Part I, we covered emotionally and physically, link here; and in Part II , we covered socially and culturally, link … Read more

The 8 Ways Diversity is Good for Your Mental Health

The Gay Men’s Chorus of Los Angeles (of which I was a member for a number of years in the 90’s) sings a song in its permanent repertoire called “Diversity”, singing about how the gay men in the Chorus come from many different states and many different occupations, and our “diversity makes us strong”.  I … Read more

The Gym/Fitness Connection in Gay Men’s Mental Health

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It’s not true that all gay men spend an inordinate amount of time in the gym, but it sure seems like it’s all of them.  For most gay men, it’s just routine.  There is something about gay male culture world-wide that seems to support the “gym lifestyle”, whether it’s for health reasons or for the … Read more

Five Tips to Survive Election Season

Quickly try this exercise:  Think about where you were 15 years ago, in the Spring of 2001.  Where were you working?  Where did you go for lunch? Who was your favorite co-worker?  Who was your least-favorite co-worker?  Now, who was President?  (I bet that took a second, right?).  Because when we think about the course … Read more