Gay Men’s Dating Situations That Are “No-Go” – And Their Alternatives – PART ONE

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Gay Men’s Dating Situations That Are “No-Go” – And Their Alternatives – PART ONE As a long-term (30 years in 2022) gay men’s specialist psychotherapist for individuals, couples, polycules, and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST), I work with guys daily on relationships – finding them, improving them, and, in some cases, coping with ending them. … Read more

Gay Male Relationships: What are the Boundaries Between Partners?

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Gay Male Relationships: What are the Boundaries Between Partners? As a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist and coach for 30 years now (in 2022), and more recently a nationally Certified Sex Therapist, I like to write about topics that I’m observing across recent multiple sessions with my clients from my full-time private practice.  A topic emerged … Read more

The Greeks’ Eight Types of Love as Applied to Gay Men

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The Greeks’ Eight Types of Love as Applied to Gay Men As a long-term (29 years in 2021) gay men’s specialist psychotherapist, sex therapist, and life/career/relationship coach, I have a lot of clinical experience history to draw from to help new clients.  Whenever we draw from history, we can find valuable resources from the past … Read more

Gay Men and When It’s Time to Break Up a Relationship

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Gay Men and When It’s Time to Break Up a Relationship They say, “Love is grand.”  And it is, really.  In my 29 years (in 2021) as a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist, couples therapist, sex therapist, and life/career/executive coach, I’ve worked with hundreds of gay male couples to help them improve their relationships to try … Read more

Gay Men Who Live Together Too Early

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Gay Men Who Live Together Too Early Over my long career (29 years in 2021) of providing couples therapy for gay men in California, as well as relationship coaching to guys all over the United States and other countries of the world, I’ve observed the same topics or challenges (“presenting issues” we therapists say) keep … Read more

Gay Men and Consensual Non-Monogamy Early in Relationships

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Gay Men and Consensual Non-Monogamy Early in Relationships The curriculum that trains AASECT Certified Sex Therapists like myself (which includes hundreds of hours of instruction, four in-person weekend seminars, 50 hours of clinical supervision in not less than 18 months of experience, and continuing education weekend seminar updates each year), frequently addresses the “style” of … Read more

Gay Men Using Apps: The Dilemma of Dating versus Hookups

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Gay Men Using Apps: The Dilemma of Dating versus Hookups In my psychotherapy and coaching practice as a long-term (29 years in 2021) specialist in gay men, I’ve noticed in many client sessions lately that single guys (and those in open relationships) are presenting a dilemma about how to use the online apps like Grindr, … Read more

Healthy Relationships Don’t Do That: A Guide for Gay Men’s Dating and More

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As a gay men’s specialist therapist for over 29 years (in 2021), I’ve always enjoyed being active on social media and interacting with my therapist colleagues there.  Recently I saw a great post from my local Los Angeles colleague on Instagram, Armine Asatryan, MA, LMFT, who is a specialist in anxiety and Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy.  She … Read more

Improving Gay Men’s Relationships: Meeting Three Needs: Emotional, Sexual, Interpersonal

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In a previous article (here), I cautioned single gay men about their dating skills and avoiding the all-too-often seen pitfalls of putting the emphasis in dating on the wrong things, such as Cash, Connections, and C—k.  As someone in a 19-year gay relationship with my partner/husband, I always say to clients that the things that … Read more

Three Ways to Improve Your Sex Life for Gay Men

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  In my daily work with clients as a gay men’s specialist therapist for 29 years in 2021, AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, as well as an LGBT-affirmative, gay men’s specialist coach, author, speaker, and consultant, one of the most frequent questions I get is how to help gay male couples improve their sex lives. It’s … Read more