Gay Men and Appearance Privilege:  What It Is, What To Do About It

Tips for Gay Men Aging Gracefully: Part II: Socially and Culturally

Gay Men and Appearance Privilege:  What It Is, What To Do About It Imitation and Flattery? Recently, I discovered that a gay men’s specialist therapist in Chicago had posted a string of postings in recent months on Facebook that directly coincided with a string of topics of several of my blog articles and podcast episodes … Read more

A Gay Therapist’s Tips for Gay to Men Improve Sexual Functioning: The Mind/Body Connection

How Gay Men Improve Sexual Functioning:  The Mind/Body Connection   Sexual Satisfaction as Personal Right As I’ve learned over 25 years providing gay-affirmative therapy and coaching for gay men and gay male couples all over the world, a robust mental health is made up of certain core components.  A part of good mental health is … Read more

Gay Therapist Gives Tips for Gay Men Aging Gracefully: Part I: Emotionally and Physically

Tips for Dating and Sex in Single Older Gay Men

Part I:  Emotionally and Physically In this three-part series of blog articles, I’d like to share some of the ways that I’ve seen my gay male clients benefit from therapy in a way that most people probably don’t think about:  how therapy helps with a healthy aging.  As a specialist in LGBT affirmative therapy, and … Read more

The Gym/Fitness Connection in Gay Men’s Mental Health

It’s not true that all gay men spend an inordinate amount of time in the gym, but it sure seems like it’s all of them.  For most gay men, it’s just routine.  There is something about gay male culture world-wide that seems to support the “gym lifestyle”, whether it’s for health reasons or for the … Read more

Seven Steps for Gay Men to Make Positive Changes in Life

As a psychotherapist and life/career coach for gay men for over 23 years, the question I hear most frequently from new clients, “How do I change something about my life?” They want to add something they want, get rid of something they don’t want, or change something so that it better meets their needs. This … Read more

Gay Men Seeing Escorts: Rewards and Risks

With the recent Department of Homeland Security raid and arrest of, the issue of paid sex work, also known as escorts or “prostitution” among gay men, has been a hot topic. The United States has always had an anxious relationship to all things sexual, and this is explored well in a new book by … Read more

Gay Male Sexual Abuse, Incest, and Rape Survivors: Characteristics and Coping

It’s a safe bet that every psychotherapist eventually will work with adults, male or female, who are survivors (I prefer this term over the word, “victims”) of childhood sexual abuse, incest, or sexual assault.  For the past 26 years, I have been a psychotherapist who specializes in working with gay men, and when I work … Read more

How ‘Uptown Funk’ Treadmill Dancer Carson Dean is a Hero for Our Times

This otherwise fairly normal news week in cyberspace was punctuated with a vibrant exclamation point in the form of the viral video  currently circulating the globe from a young Los Angeles gymnast, singer, dancer, model, and choreographer by the name of Carson Dean (or, as he is known most this week, “that guy doing that … Read more

Gay Men and Body Image Struggles: Waiting for the Adonis in the Mirror

When you wear extra layers of clothing, even when it’s not really part of the look you’re going for, or to keep warm; or when you stand to the back of every group photo; or when you avoid the gym, the pool, the beach, the hiking trail, or anywhere where you might wear less clothing; … Read more

Fear No Leather: Benefits of BDSM Play for the Gay, Young, and Scared Stiff

Fear No Leather:  Benefits of Gay BDSM Play for the Gay, Young, and Scared Stiff (keywords: gay bdsm, leather, rubber, s/m, b/d, kink) Imagine for a moment that you are overhearing someone talking.  They are saying the following: “Ewwww.  I just don’t get those guys.  That’s just weird.  It’s unnatural.  You’ve got to be sick … Read more